Terror organizations hold massive car wash (Satire)

JEWLARIOUS SATIRE -- Members of the Organization of Arab Petroleum Exporting Countries (OAPEC) met in Kuwait last week to address a brewing crisis. The price of oil has dropped so low (from a high of $147 per barrel in July of 2008 to a recent low of $63 per barrel) that these 11 countries are now considering drastic measures. In an off the record interview, one OAPEC Minister told Jewlarious, "We are so terrified by this drop in oil prices that we may actually have to invest in forward looking industries and maybe even.... I can hardly say it.... educate our youth. After all, how else are we going to fund the terrorists of tomorrow?"

As soon as this comment was made public, several other OAPEC Ministers were quick to rebut this claim. Abdullah Bin Hamad Al Attiyah of Libya told Jewlarious' Arabic sister outlet Al Jewlarious, "I categorically deny that we have any intention of educating our youth. Oil would have to drop to $2 per barrel before we would consider anything of the sort." Meanwhile, Saudi Minister Ali al-Nuaimi called the speculation that the Saudi Government would shift the $1 billion it usually spends to support terrorism to invest in education, "nonsense." In an exclusive interview with Al Jewlarious, he stated, "Do you know hard it is to build schools -- to plan field day, hot lunches and get all of those arts and crafts supplies for mother's day and chauffer's day? It is so much easier to just turn off the taps again."

Still, Gholamhossein Nozari of Iran did not rule the education option out, stating, "We are considering and I stress considering educating our youth." Nozari continued, "Keep in mind, we have seen hundreds of universities being built all around the world for hundreds of years -- some good, some bad. We don''t want to rush into education and suddenly have a University of Phoenix on our hands. I mean, come on -- getting your PH.D in chemical engineering online? Who are you trying to kid? When our government needs a dirty bomb to ship to Hezbollah and still maintain our plausible deniability we need someone we can count on."


Author Biography:
Samuel Shinewald is a freelance writer and amateur wrestler.

Nov 11 Elections for Jerusalem's future

Only city's youth can save city from itself, writes concerned resident Amit Poni, but to do so they must free themselves from shackles of indifference and rock municipal vote

Amit Poni Ynetnews

A colleague of mine, a blogger from Tel Aviv, wisely observed once that the level of attention dedicated to the general elections in this country compared to the municipal elections ought to be switched.

The results of the local elections, you see, have a far more direct impact on Joe Voter than the national ones. Education, sanitation, building and zoning, culture, transportation and any number of other things that affect out day-to-day lives – are all connected to our local municipality.

And boy have the residents of Jerusalem been feeling the involvement of their municipality these past years: from the inept handling of the light rail to favoritism in land appropriations for religious organizations to the out-of-control housing costs and the 'ghost town' phenomenon to sanitation problems and the continued migration of young people out of the city. And these are just some of the problems Israel's capital faces.

Many Jerusalemites just shrug their shoulders in indifference, believing there is nothing that can be done to change the situation. Others lament that the Zionist camp has lost the city, and that it has fallen to the hands of the ultra-Orthodox majority.

But rhetoric and reality are not one and the same. Haredim actually only comprise 24% of the city's population, they keep getting key positions thanks to factional unity and a high voter turnout. Meanwhile the Zionist public is plagued by a divided leadership and low voter turnout.

It doesn't take an expert to work out the following: Boost the voting figures and you could get a mayor and city council that truly reflect the capital's diverse population. The fate of Jerusalem is in all of our hands.

The most influential demographic in the upcoming elections are young people. There are 120,000 of them currently living in Jerusalem; they are the city's future, and the city needs them like it needs its next breath. The time has come for this group to become a strong political force in Jerusalem, its time they demanded clear and detailed answers from the candidates regarding their plans for the city's youth.

But demands are not enough, they must act. And the first order of business is taking five minutes to determine how the next five years will look – and casting their vote on November 11th 2008. These young people are the ones who will set into motion the revolution this city so desperately needs.

So join the effort, visit our blog – 'Not Leaving Jerusalem' – where my friends and I will keep you updated with information regarding the upcoming elections, links to events, social groups, initiatives (and parties). This blog is a service for the young Jerusalem voter who wants to save the city, but doesn't necessarily know where to start.

So what can you do? You can catch up with the comings and goings at the city council, suggest creative ideas for how to get people voting or volunteer to raise awareness amongst others like yourself in the capital.

In short, there's a lot one person can do, use the skills at your disposal towards making a difference for our city and join the growing community of young Jerusalemites who care.

If we keep the ball rolling, we can make sure that come November 11th everyone exercises their democratic rights, and we, the young residents of Jerusalem, will no longer be able to sit around and complain that the future is not in our hands. And most importantly – we will never leave this city!

Are Jews for Israel (McCain) or USA (Obama)?

Why are the Jews in Israel with US citizenship 75-80% for McCain and
the Jews in the US 75-80% for Obama?

What is the difference?

Or better yet what could be the difference? Is the difference that the Jews in the US don't have the same priorities for their future as the Jews in Israel do?

If Obama is good for America, then why do the Israeli's think Obama is bad for Israel?

Do the US Jews think that Obama is good for Israel?

These beliefs don't jive!

If the Israeli's think McCain's foriegn policy will make the Middle East safer than Obama's, why do the US Jews not agree. It can only be that Israel is not their number
one priority!

When the US Jews need a place to go, Israel will be the only safe haven. The US is the host country and the point was and is to go to Jerusalem when we could. If Jews in the US lose sight of that...perhaps they are already lost to environmental assimilation. All the davening in hte world won't fix that!


All the Best

Iran's Preconditions

So much for Obama's diplomacy.Article

Barack Obama's declaration that, if elected, he would be willing to sit down and talk to Iran "without preconditions" has been widely discussed in this country. It's a key policy difference between him and John McCain, who rejects unconditional talks with Tehran.

So what does the Islamic Republic think? The enterprising reporters at the state news agency recently asked a high-ranking official for his opinion on talks with the U.S. As it turns out, Iran has its own "preconditions" and they don't suggest a diplomatic breakthrough, or even a summit, anytime soon.

Mehdi Kalhor, Vice President for Media Affairs, said the U.S. must do two things before summit talks can take place. First, American military forces must leave the Middle East -- presumably including such countries as Iraq, Qatar, Turkey and anywhere else American soldiers are deployed in the region. Second, the U.S. must cease its support of Israel. Until Washington does both, talks are "off the agenda," the Islamic Republic News Agency reports. It quotes Mr. Kalhor as saying, "If they [the U.S.] take our advice, grounds for such talks would be well prepared.

Iran is one of the toughest and most urgent foreign policy problems the new U.S. Administration will face. If Mr. Obama ends up in the Oval Office on January 20, he may find that solving it will take more than walking into a room and talking to Iranians "without preconditions."

Why I voted for John McCain

Naomi Ragen explains why she voted for staunch patriot and not for a virtual unknown

The first election I remember clearly was that of John F. Kennedy. I was a little girl at the time, but the handsome candidate won my heart, and the election. For decades the differences between Democrats and Republicans in America have been slight, with one candidate a little more articulate or photogenic than the other, but certainly both were capable, patriotic, and experienced.

This election – probably one of the most important in the history of America – changes all that. Faced with hostile forces which threaten all of us in the free and civilized world, Americans experienced just how dangerous their position is on Sept. 11, when their safe, protected world came crashing down on their surprised and unsuspecting heads. In this election, Americans either chose to continue fighting those forces by voting for John McCain – a staunch patriot and war hero, or to give in and give up by choosing Barack Hussein Obama, a virtual unknown who wants to slash America’s defenses, lose her war in Iraq, and start unconditional talks with homicidal maniacs that threaten us all with atomic war.

I trust John McCain on security. He is the son and grandson of four star navy admirals. He has a son serving in Iraq. He was tortured in a Vietnamese prison for five and a half years, and wouldn’t let his father – supreme commander of all US forces in that war - use his connections to get him out. He understands the importance of winning the war in Iraq to Israel’s security. As he said: “We are engaged in a basic struggle between humanity and inhumanity; between builders and destroyers. If fighting these people is not intrinsic to the national security and most cherished values of the United States, I don’t know what is.”

Barack Hussein Obama, on the other hand, is the son of a white woman from Kansas and a Black Muslim from Kenya. He has never served in the military. His spiritual mentor is Rev. Wright, a Black racist and anti-Semite who preaches “God damn America” from the pulpit. Obama calls himself a “citizen of the world,” and is popular with European haters of America. He has other close friends who hate America, including domestic terrorist Bill Ayers who blew up buildings in the ‘60s, and planned to blow up the Pentagon.

Obama is also friends with Israel-hating Rashid Khalidi who had close ties with the PLO, and indicted Syrian-American slumlord Tony Rezko. Obama has often said that one of his first acts as president will be to remove US troops from Iraq and to hold unconditional talks with a terrorist like Ahmadinejad.

The Democrats have run a very, very expensive campaign, financed by million of dollars of foreign donations (which are illegal,) including money from Arabs in Gaza, to hide these facts. They have succeeded in convincing Jews to believe what they are told, not what they should be able to see with their own eyes. It is estimated 75% of Jews will vote for Obama. They will vote for him to feel that they are “enlightened,” overcoming any prejudice against a Muslim and a Black man. They will vote for him because they have been told he will be better for the economy (He won’t. He’ll destroy the US economy with new taxes.) They will vote for him because they have no G-d, don’t really care what is best for Israel, and because they want to feel like liberal Americans who read the New York Times, not ethnic outsiders.

People like me are harder to convince. I voted for John McCain, and so did every other American in Israel I know, Jew and gentile, religious and secular.

Obama Tells Abbas: I Support Dividing Jerusalem

(Arab store selling OBAMA mugs)

(IsraelNN.com) by Hana Levi Julian

Democratic presidential candidate Senator Barack Obama privately expressed his support for a new Arab state within Israel's current borders, including eastern Jerusalem, during his meeting with Palestinian Authority Chairman and Fatah leader Mahmoud Abbas in Ramallah this summer.

According to a report published Tuesday in the Lebanese newspaper al-Ahbar, Obama told Abbas that he supports a PA state, and Arab "rights to east Jerusalem" as well. The sources said Abbas and PA Prime Minister Salam Fayyad "heard the best things they ever heard from an American president" during the meeting. However, said sources quoted in the report, the candidate asked them to keep his declaration a secret.

PA spokesman Nimar Hamad said he had no comment on the remarks, other than to describe the briefing Abbas and Fayyad had given to the presidential hopeful.

"The Palestinian Authority views the American elections as an internal matter and does not favor one person over another," he said in an official statement. "The PA hopes that the next American president will fulfill his commitment towards the Palestinians and pressure Israel."

Abbas, Fayyad and the rest of the Arab world are clearly hoping for an Obama victory, however. Hamas sources quoted in the article said that Arabs fear new wars would break out in the Middle East if Republican candidate Senator John McCain wins, but they believe there will be an official peace agreement with an Obama White House.

Mixed Messages in Gaza
PA Arabs who live in Gaza were reportedly celebrating in the streets with impromptu demonstrations, waving Hamas flags in anticipation of an Obama win, according to Voice of Israel government radio.

But officials for the terrorist group that controls the region were skeptical that a change in the White House would lead to a change in facts on the ground.

Hamas spokesman Fawzi Barhum was quoted by Voice of Israel as saying that voters who would have to choose between Obama and McCain were being presented with two "awful" options.

The group's Damascus-based political bureau chief, Khaled Mashaal, softened the statement by saying the group is prepared to work with any U.S. president and would welcome any change in American policy, especially if it corrected what he referred to as a "bias" toward the Jewish State.

Expulsions in Hevron

It sounds like the Leftist Israeli Government still led by a combo of lame ducks - Olmert who is in office and Tzippora who may no be able to get into office are attempting to expel more Jews from Hevron.

At what point will the Israeli population say enough and force a change in leadership?
What has to happen? The Hudna and the Security Fence have certainly quieted down all
of the citizens who only want peace...now..at any future cost.

Now they are trying to people that are truly Torah observant under fire... the "settlers" in the hills. Clearly the "new" government is trying to make a point
that the "settlers" are an abberation and not the heart and soul of Israel.

This is just shameful

Bending the truth

Tamar Sternthal - In Ynetnews

On Jan. 17, 2002 Abdul Salaam Sadek Hassouneh of Nablus burst into a bat mitzvah celebration at a Hadera reception hall, shooting dead six and injuring 35 before Israeli security forces ended the bloodbath by killing him.

But Hassouneh has another, lesser known claim to notoriety. He was the first of several Palestinian terrorists killed while attacking Israelis to appear that year in B'Tselem's list of "Palestinian civilians killed by Israeli security forces." He was followed by numerous other so-called Palestinian "civilians" in 2002, including Omar Mahmoud Abu Rub and Yusef Muhammad Abu Rub, killed by border police gunfire after they murdered six Israeli civilians in Beit She'an. Both attacks were claimed by Fatah's al-Aqsa Martyrs' Brigades.

B'Tselem: Jewish West Bank settlers grab more land / Ali Waked and Reuters
Human rights group issues report saying settlements grabbed land, some of it privately owned by Palestinians, by fencing it off or by intimidation, calls on settlers to 'return to Israel'. Yesha Council: If B'Tselem's demands heeded, it will be easier to murder Jews

In the wake of CAMERA's criticism of this grossly deceptive practice, B'Tselem revamped its methodology for tracking Palestinian casualties of the intifada. In more recent years, the self- described human rights organization has dropped the "civilian" label as pertaining to Palestinians and describes most - but not all - Palestinians fatalities as either "killed when participating in hostilities" or "did not participate in hostilities when killed."

Nevertheless, the organization's current detailed data on all Palestinians killed by Israelis since Sept. 29, 2000 - cited widely by Western news organizations - are no less problematic for a number of reasons. Most importantly, B'Tselem's research is as shoddy and unreliable as ever.

Take for instance, the case of 11-year-old Muhammad Ali Abu al-Wafa, killed Dec. 31, 2007 in Khan Younis. B'Tselem lists him as one of those killed by Israeli security forces, although he actually died in Hamas-Fatah clashes, a fact undisputed by Palestinian sources such as the Palestinian Centre for Human Rights and Ma'an News Agency.

Even more shocking, perhaps, is that B'Tselem continues to blame Israeli security forces for the Sept. 30, 2000 death of 12-year-old Muhammad al-Dura, despite the fact that a number of independent investigations have definitively ruled out that possibility.

And, as it turns out, B'Tselem's newer system distinguishing between those who were and were not participating in hostilities when killed is no more trustworthy than its earlier false identification of "civilians." Thus, B'Tselem reports that Muhammad Zaki Jum'ah al-Najar, killed Nov. 20, 2007 in Khan Younis, "did not participate in hostilities when killed." Yet, Hamas' English website boasts that "today, al-Qassam Brigades mourn the death of the mujahim (fighter): Mohammed Zaki al Najjar. The mujahid was martyred during a clash with the Zionist occupation forces. . . "

An examination of this year's data is just as disheartening. B'Tselem carries an unusually brief listing for Fahmi Abd al-Jawad Hussein a-Darduk, 15, of Nablus, killed May 19, 2008 "by gunfire." B'Tselem does not specify that he was "killed while participating in hostilities" even though he was carrying explosives and ignored soldiers orders to stop and raise his hands at a checkpoint when he was killed.

Another serious flaw in B'Tselem's current data is that terrorists' affiliations are virtually always ignored. Thus, one would have no idea that Bilal Hamuda Muhammad Saleh, supposedly "killed while sleeping in a car" April 17, 2008 was the head of Islamic Jihad in Qabatiya, or that Muhammad Shhadeh Abed Shhadeh (a-Ta'amari), killed March 12, 2008 in the Tulkarm district, headed Islamic Jihad in Bethlehem.

Making this omission yet more deceptive, B'Tselem's end-of-the-year press release on
Palestinian casualties specifically claims that the organization has tallied civilian Palestinian casualties. For instance, the press release from Dec. 31, 2007 misleads, stating that in 2007 Israeli security forces killed 373 Palestinians and that "about 35 percent of those killed were civilians who were not taking part in the hostilities when killed."

Yet, Islamic Jihad leaders from Bethlehem or Qabatiya, even if they weren't murdering anyone at the moment they were killed, are no more civilians than the man who shot dead six people celebrating at a bat mitzvah.

Unfortunately, journalists are time-strapped, and most are unlikely to look past B'Tselem's user-friendly press release to discover the inconsistencies and blatant falsehoods that stand behind it.

This leaves yet one more casualty of the conflict - the truth.
Tamar Sternthal is director of the Israel office of CAMERA (Committee for Accuracy in Middle East Reporting in America), www.camera.org .

Americans voting from Israel....

For Americans voting from Israel, the elections are over. Early polling
suggests 75% of the 200,000 Americans eligible to vote here, did so for John
McCain. I was one of them. Below I tell you why.

As I and my family anxiously await the election returns from America here
in Jerusalem, we will be wondering not only if Barack Hussein Obama will be
elected, but if this will be the last free elections ever held in the U.S.
With massive voter fraud by Obama's protégé, ACORN, which is not a voter
registration organization, but a pack- the- voting- rolls- with- Democrats
–for- Obama organization; with Nancy Pelosi and Harry Reid ready to pass
the "Media Fairness Doctrine" that would outlaw any fairness in the media
(even the little there is now), the ban on secret ballots in unions, and
Obama's documented disdain for the "mistakes" of the Constitution that he is
planning to 'correct' while he 'spreads the wealth,' we may not be having
this conversation again, if ever.

With every blessing, and still some hope,

Naomi Ragen

Fire in Hebron: Rightists burn Palestinian flag

Tensions high in Hebron:
Several right-wing activists have been documented Sunday burning a Palestinian flag and trampling on it, while threatening Palestinian residents in the West Bank town of Hebron. (Yea, let the resistance begin!)

The incident took place upon the beginning of a Palestinian Authority campaign aimed at "removing the siege from the heart of Hebron." The campaign aims to protest the roadblocks faced by residents within the city. Palestinians are upset (Awwww) that many roads are blocked to Palestinian movement and can only be used by Jewish settlers.

The Palestinians held several rallies around the city and Palestinian flags were hung on roofs, businesses, and cars. However, some settlers were apparently unimpressed with the flags: A female settler removed a flag from a fence while cursing Palestinian passersby. The woman was joined by a group of settlers headed by rightist activist Baruch Marzel (Hero) , who proceeded to burn and trample on the flag, while pledging that "Palestinians will have unbearable life in Hebron."


The settlers said that whoever dares wave the Palestinian flag "will be trampled on like we trample on the flag." Palestinian eyewitnesses said police officers at the scene did not attempt to intervene or prevent Marzel from burning the flag. "We know of Palestinians who have been sent to prison for three years for burning an Israeli flag," a Palestinian activist said.

In a talk with Ynet, Marzel confirmed that he burned a Palestinian flag, and said that developments in Hebron amount to provocations staged by Palestinians and leftist anarchists.

"Since morning hours, leftist activists were walking around Hebron along with Palestinians (traitors?), while carrying banned PLO flags. I wonder what would have happened if we held up Kahane (Meir) flags. What is being done here is incitement against Jewish residents."

--------------
Finally we begin to stand up to these trespassers. let their be a new government in Israel that expels the Arabs once and for all!

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jewish_National_Front